Loneliness and Solitude

Being alone is neither good or bad! Only thinking makes it so.

While at first solitude and loneliness appear to mean the same thing, they’re really not. Solitude doesn’t have the feeling of lack that loneliness does: solitude is simply the state of being physically or virtually alone and many people seek solitude as a source of peace and rejuvenation.

Loneliness, however, is the mental anguish and pain of feeling alone and, at the end of a relationship, accompanied by feelings of betrayal and abandonment. Ironically, loneliness does not require the state of being physically alone. Loneliness can be just as easily experienced in crowds. Take a look around you next time you are travelling on public transport. It’s hardly a party, is it?

I confess I experienced these lonely feelings for a long period after my break up – and I constantly craved an end to them. These days, I can welcome solitude and almost never feel lonely. I didn’t really get the distinction between loneliness and solitude until I gave up on my own self pity. However, people differ from one to another. While some people prefer solitude to unwind and recharge their batteries , others are more outgoing and prefer social contact for the exact same reasons.

For those that prefer social contact, feelings of loneliness while being alone can be harder to overcome. Being alone lacks the distraction factor of being in company. Just know that loneliness is an emotion independent of your circumstances and not necessarily dependent on your environment.

The remedy for loneliness does not lie in constantly seeking out company. Being in company scratches the invisible rash of loneliness. It might feel good at the time but when you find yourself alone again the itch soon returns with a vengeance.

Loneliness is a feeling, an interpretation of the mind. Seeking out the company of friends can suppress your lonely feelings but if you never distinguish loneliness from solitude, loneliness will constantly return haunt you in the moments you are alone.

In the absence of loneliness, solitude can give you a feeling of great liberation once you are comfortable in your own skin. And whatever you feel right now, distinguishing the difference between solitude and loneliness will leap you forward in your personal evolution.